So it’s been a bit since my last update, and I figured that with the excess of time I have this weekend, that I might jot a bit down.
To start, I’m done my undergrad!!! I actually can’t believe that at all. Cause it seems like these past four years have just flown by. And while I’m glad this leg of my education is done, I also feel that I am leaving a lot behind. These past four years have garnered me the opportunity to develop some profound friendships, and have brought people into my life that I love so much. My friends have been there for me, and done so much for me, that I cannot even begin to express my gratitude. But while my graduation entails moving from one institution to another, it does not nor should not mean moving on from one friend to another. I miss everyone so much and can’t wait to see everyone again!
This past year for me has been a year of serious reflection, challenging my beliefs, my core, my ideology and my ambition. As a year of transition, I was poised to choose the next path I would take in life. I applied to med schools throughout Ontario, and was unsuccessful. My ambition through life has been to help others, and over the past three years has become my motivation to be a physician. To not even have the opportunity to interview for med school truly challenged the goals that I created in my life. I spent the latter half of this year questioning myself and aspirations. I began exploring other options, other career choices in a manner of “just in case.” My energy became so focused on creating progress for these other opportunities that I was failing to create progress for the opportunity that I had originally created for myself – that is to be a doctor. I had it in my mind the way these next few years would work out, and when this was challenged, I felt lost. Life is not predictable, and I realized that the possibility of me being a physician is just as present as it was last year and the year before and the year before that. The route that I’ll take to get there is just different.
I applied in February to the department of Laboratory Medicine & Pathobiology at the University of Toronto for their M.Sc. program, and was offered early acceptance. While simply a formality, it boiled down to finding a supervisor. Hoping that I’d be able to continue my research in mammalian kidney development with Dr. N. D. Rosenblum at SickKids in Toronto, I was challenged once again to obtain funding to supplement my studies. In the current economic situation, supervisors, and institutions alike are being more cautious with their money. Consequently, obtaining an external funding source relieves the financial burden placed on a supervisor. While I applied for external funding, I was unsuccessful, and due to the expensive nature associated with developmental biology research, it became necessary for me to consider other supervisors. However as fate may have it, Dr. Rosenblum was able to afford to take me on anyways. I have an inexpressible amount of gratitude for Dr. Rosenblum, and the opportunities he has given me, and continues to give me.
As a M.Sc. student, I am given a yearly stipend. And while it’s certainly not enough for a lavish life, it’s without a doubt one of the most generous M.Sc. stipends that is available. Having the means to do so now, I am looking at purchasing a condo in the heart of Toronto, where I will, at the very minimum, be spending the next two years. In addition, my M.Sc. project has the potential to turn into a Ph.D. and I wish to pursue medicine at the University of Toronto. Consequently, I may truly need a place in the city for much longer than that. All in all, I feel it is a good choice, especially considering the availability of low interest rates and the depression in property value. Party at my place?!
While this year has been a year of transition and change and reflection, I feel even more confident in the choices that I have made and continue to make. The simple fact that I return to what I’ve always striven for tells me that this truly is what I want in my life, and to add excuses to the contrary does nothing more than to detract from achievement.
Beyond all else, I need to thank everyone for believing in me, and listening to me and caring for me, however sour apples I may have been. I’ll let everyone know when the condo party is. Ha ha.
Love as always,
Josh
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